(g9)

what's today's free gift
with a packet of condoms?
- mini-address book!

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Gee Cross, 12th November 1991

Publication

1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)

tanka 5

Sailing on the Dee
we talked of former lovers,
shared new memories;
in rooms not far from the Zoo
animal passions cried out.

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Gee Cross, 24th August 1991

Publications

1992 Bare Bones (UK)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1993 New Hope International Writing (UK)
1994 Lo Straniero (Italy)
1994 WIND FIVE FOLDED (Gualala, AHA Books)
2001 IN THE SHIP'S WAKE (North Shields, Iron Press)

*****
Velejando no Dee
falamos de antigos amantes
compartilhamos novas memorias
em lugares nao muito longe do zoologico
as paixoes animais gritam

GERALD ENGLAND

Translated by Teresinka Pereira

Publications

1992 International Poetry (USA)
1993 New Hope International Writing (UK)

tanka 1

up Ingleborough
snow gathers in the gullies;
at the Cave Rescue
strong tea is brewed, awaiting
the inevitable call.

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Clapham, 18th August 1991

Publications

1992 Bare Bones
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1994 WIND FIVE FOLDED (Gualala, AHA Books)

(57)

sunday-morning sex
lasts only as long as the
children's video


© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Gee Cross, 14th July 1991

Publications

1991 The Haiku Quarterly (UK)
1992 THE HAIKU HUNDRED (Newcastle upon Tyne, Iron Press)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
2002 World Haiku Association (Internet)
2003 Version (Internet)
2003 HAIKU FOR LOVERS (London, MQ Publications)
2015 THE HAIKU HUNDRED THE HISTORIC COLLECTION (Newcastle upon Tyne, Iron Press)

*****
Секс в воскресенье утром
Столько же будет длиться,
Сколько кассета сынишки...

Russian translation by Ull

Publication

2003 Version (Internet)

*****
German translation by Hans Christian Meiser - text not to hand.

Publication

2005 HAIKU FÜR LIEBENDE (Düsseldorf, Patmos)

Greta Garbo on the Blackpool Bus

GRETA GARBO ON THE BLACKPOOL BUS

Elsie Williamson

met Greta Garbo on a Blackpool bus

going to visit a friend

in Poulton-le-Fylde.

"Ee luv, you do look like her;

I've seen all her films, you know;

I think I must be one of her biggest fans!"

"Have I many fans in Blackpool ?",

biting her lips at the utterance of "I".

"O hundreds, luv, and I reckon on

there must be at least a million

in the whole of Lancashire -

will you come to tea with me tomorrow?"

She scribbled her address

on the back of a brown envelope

that had had her gas-bill in;

"Must dash - this is my stop -

see you tomorrow".

George told her she was daft

but enjoyed the ham and ate the cake.

Two weeks later

a letter arrived

with two complimentary tickets

for the film premiere in London.

Elsie wondered

where she could find

the money for the train-fare.

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed:  Gee Cross, 6th June 1990

Publications

1991 The Vincent Brothers Review (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1994 Current Accounts (UK)
1997 Pickings (Internet)

My Last Poem About Snow

MY LAST POEM ABOUT SNOW

I shan't write again about the snow
telling of icicles and drifts.
I won't again write of how my mother
put me out in my pram
in the deep snows of '47,
the only time, she said, I would sleep.
No more will my pen reveal
the secrets of the snowmen
my brothers built by the railway line
and how the heads melted
when the steam-trains came.
I will not tell again of that December in the 60s
when I walked out of Glasgow in a snow-storm;
a promised lift to Annan at 5am broken,
I thumbed my way South.
In those pre-motorway days the route lay
through the slush-strewn streets of towns -
Hamilton, Lockerbie, Carlisle, Penrith, Kendal,
Settle, Skipton, Ilkley, Otley, Wetherby, Pontefract -
the snow reflecting the civic pride of each
as festive lights brightened the grey day.
Not again shall I write about snow
nor again tell of the return from Liverpool -
when going up Rushup Edge in my old Anglia
I skidded, ending up at 45 degrees
with a dry stone wall an inch away.
It was dark before the grit-wagon came.
They were only going as far as Edale
but towed me out and I returned
to overnight at the Kings Arms in Chapel-en-le-Frith.
The next day I dug out the car
and joined the convoy of lorries
shuffling slowly over Peak Forest toward Chesterfield.
I will not write again about snow
nor tell of the winter of '74
when the world drowned in white,
when the weathermen talked
of temperatures rising towards freezing.
I will not tell of the weeks
when travel virtually ceased
and the drifts blocked
even the entrance to the cemetery.
I will not write again about snow.
Snow is not chaste, unsunn'd
as Shakespeare would have us think.
Snow is not forgetful.
Snow is not a white-wool blanket
Snow is not ice-cream topping for a mountain cone
It does not melt like a retreating army
but swells streams and floods drains.
Snow is simply cold crystals of ice
that fall from a cloud-thick sky.
Eskimos have twenty-seven different words
but there is only one snow
and I shall not write of it again.

Until the winters of yesteryear return
- les neiges d'antan de Villon -,
until the icebergs no longer drift South,
until the earth's warming ceases
I shall not write again of snow.

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Hyde, 1st May 1990

Publications

1990 Crooked Roads (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1999 Unlikely Stories (Internet)

Me and the other Gerald

ME AND THE OTHER GERALD

Yeah, yeah, I know what I said

I don't write poems about poetry

I don't write long rambling

discourses on all and sundry

but hell when it happened

something had to give or else

or else or else or else or else.

Karl Heiss started it -

sent me a copy of HIPPO

and there I am listed as contributor

but I'm not - Gerald Locklin is

and there are his biog. notes

under my name - it won't do will it?

And the same day

I get sent a review tape from SLIPSTREAM

and it's Locklin rambling on

the way he does about the minutiae of his life

how he fucks his students

and makes poems out of non-events

sure he raises a laugh or two

and some of it isn't that bad at all

Well I stuck the tape in the car-cassette player

and listened to Locklin as I went to work

I stopped at Mrs Jones'

she tells me how her washing-machine

won't do what she wants it to

asks me what my wife would do

I know what my wife would do

but I'm not going to tell that to Mrs Jones.

Back in the car Locklin is laughing at himself

Mr Iqbal wants to find out if the maturity value

of his endowment that comes up next year

will be enough to pay the dowry

for his daughter still back in Pakistan.

Locklin is talking shit about Donald Duck.

Miss Prendergast says she can't pay me this week

the Social haven't sent her her giro

and she's had to buy little Gareth new shoes.

As she bends to pick the baby's dummy off the floor

I'm treated to a clear view of her floppy breasts

and she smiles at me.

Does she want me to screw her in lieu of payment?

Well I've fifty more calls to get through today

Locklin is wondering if he can afford another divorce

He thinks he's living life, hey

Let him try selling insurance in Oldham

The tape ends.

By the time I've finished my round

I've got through two more tapes

but these are "Dolly Parton's Greatest Hits"

and "Brass Band Favourites"!

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Bardsley, 14th April 1990

Publications

1991 The Plastic Tower (USA)

1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)

1995 Boggers All (UK)

1998 The Bohemian Forest (Internet)

Stealing Kisses

              STEALING KISSES

              He loves pretty girls,
              singles them out,
              goes straight up
              and plonks a sloppy kiss
              on their hand or face or cheek
              and looks for the twinkle in their eyes

              Because he is small
              and handicapped
              and loveable
              and totally irresistible
              they hug him,
              cuddle him and kiss him.

              I am jealous of my son.

              If I tried the same,
              they would probably belt me;
              certainly his mum would.

             ©  GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Banchory, 11th August 1989

Publications

1990 The White Rose (UK)
1990 Bardoni (UK)
1991 Hybrid (UK)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1993 Prophetic Voices (USA)
1997 Cyberscribers (Internet)

Bennachie

BENNACHIE

There is a car-park
at the back of Bennachie
and a log-cabin loo in preservative green.
Forestry Commission firs populate the slopes -
these trees the new colonisers
of ground where men eked a bare living
before the lairds divided the land.

The cone of the Mither Tap
oversees all Buchan and Strathbogie,
this Iron Age fort now tumble-down scree
- granite lintels weather slowly.

Twenty-nine bullocks are daily led
to pasture under the mountain's side -
the thirtieth loner, sufferer of sunburn,
is left companion to the tractor.

A road leads by "My Lord's Throat"
where the larynxed Don is littered
by stone teeth that seem to be
as old as Bennachie itself.

© Gerald England

Composed: Monymusk, 8th August 1989

Publications

1990 Kangaroos & Beans (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1995 Northwords (UK)
1998 Perihelion (Internet)
1998 The Endless Mountains Review (USA)

Nidderdale

NIDDERDALE

Bedraggled daffodils line the lanes
unnerved by April snows.
Only the curlew crying on the fell,
the short-eared owl stationed on his post,
know that summer still will come
as surely as the growing lambs will go.

By the lake where a myriad mosquitos hum,
only the bravest rabbit boasts
of the ability to foretell
how strong will be the wind's abuse,
how many elms will no longer grow
to offer shelter to the homeless crow.

© Gerald England

Composed: Ripley Castle, 23rd April 1989

Publications

1991 Hybrid (UK)

1991 Owen Wister Review (USA)

1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)

1992 International Poetry (USA)

2000 NO CHOICE BUT TO TRUST (Pittsburgh, UnMon America)

2006 Other Voices (Internet)

Schrödinger's Thought Experiment

SCHROEDINGER'S THOUGHT EXPERIMENT

In the box there is a cat
and a capsule of cyanide.
The chances of the capsule
disintegrating, releasing deadly gas,
killing the cat,
are strictly fifty-fifty.

When we open the box
the cat will be alive
else the cat will be dead.

Until we open the box
what is the state of the cat ?

The relativity physicist
simply doesn't know.

The quantum physicist
is not at all uncertain -
the cat is both alive and dead -
in suspended animation.
It his opening of the box
that will resolve the matter
one way or the other.

The cat is an existentialist.

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Gee Cross, 10th January 1988

Publications

1990 Spider Eyes (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1995 POSITIVELY POETRY (Hyde, New Hope International)
1997 Dark Planet (Internet)

*****

EXPERIMENTUL "PISICA LUI SCHRODINGER"

In cutie avem o pisica

Si o capsula cu cianura

Sansele capsulei de a se desintegra

Eliberand gazul mortal si ucigand pisica

Sunt strict egale.

Cand vom deschide cutia

pisica va fi vie

sau, in caz contrar, moarta.

Dar pana sa deschidem cutia

Care este starea pisicii?

Fizicianul relativist

pur si simplu nu stie.

Fizicianul quantic

nu are indoieli defel-

pisica este si vie si moarta-

in animatie suspendata.

Doar deschiderea cutiei

va rezolva problema

intr-un fel sau altul.

Pisica este existentialista......

GERALD ENGLAND

Romanian translation by Octavian Blaga and Florentin Smarandache

Publication

2000 The Fifth Season (Romania)

Bread

BREAD

              Nutty brown wholemeal,
              wheat germ, standard white,
              supermarket pre-wrapped cardboard,
              stale wedding reception left-overs;
              it's all the same
              to Bewick swans and Mallard ducks
              fighting for every thrown crumb,
              quacking and screeching
              at upstart gulls and starlings
              keen to encroach on banks.
              Only when the last bag of bread
              is emptied,
              the last child departed,
              will they retire
              fat to the island.

              © GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Ashton under Lyne, 20th September 1987

Publications

1990 Aireings (UK)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1998 The Morpo Review (Internet)

Ballade of Arthur Dent

BALLADE OF ARTHUR DENT

Damn the Sirius Cybernetics' Corporation,
there are things not said in the Hitchhiker's Guide.
I need some proper elaboration -
the Nutrimat seems to deliver pesticide!
I'm sure that my brain is about to collide
unless the mind in my head is an absentee.
There's one thing I've craved since I started this ride
- all that I want is a decent cup of tea !

Parts of the Universe defy exploration
but even Zaphod Beeblebrox won't know where to hide
when the Vogon's decide on redecoration
to fill all the lakes with hydrogen chloride -
such actions as Marvin could never abide,
but that paranoid android's only a draftee
in whom scatter-brained humans fail to confide
- all that I want is a decent cup of tea !

In Vogon poetry there's no melioration
but unless you appeal to the Captain's pride
the Heart of Gold won't see restoration -
only Bugblatter Beasts can breath carbon monoxide
and they actually thrive on cyanide.
Once I was an Infocom devotee
but now I'm considering suicide
- all that I want is a decent cup of tea !

ENVOI

Ford, I've followed you all the way across the great divide.
I realise there can be no guarantee
but seven sixes is the answer I'll provide
- all that I want is a decent cup of tea !

© Gerald England

Composed: Ashton under Lyne, 1st November 1986

Publications

1990 Weyfarers (UK)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1993 Periaktos (UK)

By A Sleepy English Village

BY A SLEEPY ENGLISH VILLAGE

            Beyond the wooded embankment home
                   of Flopsy, Mopsey, Bobtail -
            over which the diesels thunder
            on their flight from King's Cross to Waverley
            the village lies hidden from view

            The green is split but each side
                   cottage-lined -
            a wood of shelter for snails
            opposite bare grass and war-memorial
            with Church Lane a "No Through Road"

            Between the Post Office Stores, half
                   of a house -
            and the Elephant & Castle's bloated car-park
            leading to beer-garden, swings, play-area,
            stands the twice-a-week bus shelter

            The parish notice-board is discreet
                   but manifests -
            a note from the US Airforce concerning
            a vital twenty-four hour NATO exercise
            during which the commander will ensure

            night-time flying is to be kept
                   to a minimum -
            On the approach lane to a nearby hamlet
            a warning-sign establishes priority
            - "Slow ! Ducks crossing !"

           © GERALD ENGLAND.

Composed: Nacton, 8th August 1986

Publications

1986 Periaktos (UK)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1992 Quickenings (USA)
1995 POSITIVELY POETRY (Hyde, New Hope International)
1998 Creative Ooze (Internet)
2008 Ackworth born, gone West (Internet)

Gentle

GENTLE

(for B.S.)

"Gentle Jesus, meek and mild"  — Charles Wesley.

Who threw the money-changers
from the temple?

Who endured pain,
suffered children?

Who turned water to wine,
fishermen to saints?

Who walked on water,
trod on Roman toes?

Being gentle
is never a soft
option!

Gentle opens more doors
than hard knocking,
can turn the key
to eternity!


© Gerald England

Composed: Ashton under Lyne, 29th September 1985

Publications

1988 Tandava (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1998 The Morpo Review (Internet)

*****

              GENTIL

              (Para B.S.)

                  "Gentil Jesus, manso e docil"

                             Charles Wesley.

              Quem tocou os cambistas

              do templo ?

              Quem suportou a dor

              e o sofrimento das criancas ?

              Quem transformou a agua no vinho,

              pescadores em santos ?

              Quem caminhou sobre as aguas

              e pisou no calcanhar dos romanos ?

              Ser gentil

              nao e nunca a opcao

              mais suave

              Ser gentil abre mais portas

              do que bater com forca,

              e tambem pode abrir com chave

              a eternidade!

              © GERALD ENGLAND

              (Portuguese translation by TERESINKA PEREIRA)

Publication

1988 Directory of International Writers & Artists (USA)

Churchill Barriers, Orkney

               CHURCHILL BARRIERS, ORKNEY

               Going to Glimps Holm
               the mast of a sunken ship
               still rises offshore,
               a rusty reminder
               of how this road was built,
               linking islands,
               bringing peace to Scapa Flow.

               In men's minds
               are the barriers to peace,
               separating lands,
               alienating people;
               but the barriers to war
               support roads,
               join people together.

               © GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: off Fair Isle, 8th August 1985

Publications

1986 International Journal on World Peace (USA)
1990 International Poetry (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)

Status Quo

STATUS QUO

Re-listening to sixties' protest songs
recalling fledgling dreams.
We thought then if folk would only hear
the world's ways would change
in a revolution of peace and love.

Our mono records revolve on turntables
engineered for stereophonic sound.
Deafened by and deaf to heavy metal
we wonder how much our sons
will do to change their parents' world.

© Gerald England

Composed: Ashton under Lyne, 12th December 1984

Publications


1986 Folio (UK)
1988 International Poetry (USA)
1989 A POEM FOR DADDY (Whitby, Canada, Plowman)
1991 Sacrifice The Common Sense (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1997 Grape (Internet)
2008 Ackworth born, gone West (Internet)

Lights

Photograph © Gerald England

LIGHTS

As midnight approaches

I stand with the dog

watching the embers

of a fire

dying on the beach.

Behind me are the lights

of several caravans.

Three cottages on

once-uninhabited Erraid,

Robert Louis Stevenson's

unhappy childhood home,

throw their light

across the Sound.

Beyond the black shapes

of sundry, rocky islets

are the bright lights of Iona

shining across the water

Earlier from the beach

we had watched the sun

set over I.,

each ray illuming

a pigeon-toe sky.

Now as morrow

becomes day

dog and master

settle to sleep

having seen.

© Gerald England

Composed: Fionnphort, 1st August 1984

Publications

1985 Periaktos (UK)
1989 Eavesdropper (UK)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)

Poppies

POPPIES

(for Edward Thomas)

Unrisen the early mower
only the all night lit windows
hint of humanity in gardens
where an indolent owl flies
sleepwalking in the misty joy
past the church by the green
to the highporched barn of a deserted farm
It alone gives life
to the doorless stables and cumbered stalls
The weathervane fox is rusted south
never telling of the hateful east
the rainy west or crude north wind
Luxuriant nettles, tall tansy
fleabane, dandelions, hawkweeds
testify to anxious labourers
leaning on plough or scythe or hoe
to watch the hounds or a carriage go by
Not fifty yards away
beyond a shadowy corner
seen in the broad halflight before sunrise
the crimson of uncountable poppies
enmeshed with thoughts of mist pearl
desirable as an Italian illusion
having the serene strange beauty
of a woman born of summer air

Yet half an hour
would have seen them reaped

To have come thus far
and know the distance less
to be less than the equal of a poppy
- how else retain the courage
still to voyage on ?

The poppies still shine
and from his tower of ivory
yet does the blackbird sing

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Ashton under Lyne 14th December 1981

Publications

1988 Facet (USA)
1989 Quickenings (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1992 Wildflower (USA)
1998 Ygdrasil (Internet)

Powh

POWH

my son builds with his Lego
powh, powh, powh, he shoots
daddy doesn't like guns, he says,
this is a radiator
powh, powh, powh.

© GERALD ENGLAND

Composed: Ashton under Lyne, 1st December 1981

Publications

1983 Literature (USA)
1983 Box of Rain (UK)
1990 Sword of Shahrazad (USA)
1992 STEALING KISSES (Hyde, New Hope International)
1998 Christian Poetry Review (UK)